Sad but true tales of idiots.

Humanity fascinates me. It is one of those things which really is special in this universe. The advances in art, science and mathematics are astounding, but on the opposite side of the same coin, I am amazed at how low people can sink. Now I am not talking about the those that have given up, that will be saved for another time, but what I mean is those people who start talking before they start thinking (if they ever did think in the first place).

Taking disability claims wears on a person. I have seen some good things and some bad things, but the majority of what I see falls in the middle. There have been numerous occasions when I am going through the interview and I get to the point where I have to ask about the different medications they were on and invariably I run across someone who says they are taking the medication Ambien. We have all see the commercials for this particular medication so I won't go into what it is suppose to do. My next question for the person is to ask if there are any side effects. There have been four such occasions when the person sitting across from me says that the side effect they experience on this medication is sleepiness.

I got into an argument with a co-worker a few months ago. I don't really care that much for this individual. I understand gravity takes its toll on the human body, but she seems to be more affected by it that others. It's not that her breasts sag, but her entire body sags. I just want to walk up to her and pull her hair up and stick a dowel through the top of her scalp to keep her skin from falling off of her body. She is one of the most negative people I have ever met in my life. She has never had a kind word to say to anybody or anything. I will refer to her as Taco Biter. (You can figure this one out on your own later.) She had to sit next to me to interview one day. Normally she does not sit next to me, but her usual spot was occupied. She walked up to the desk usually occupied by a good buddy of mine and made a rather rude comment about what a messy work station he had. She was genuinely disgusted. I let the first remark go, but the second remark was one that I would not stand for. She said that he was all show and questioned his integrity. I went off on her. I told her that she should really "try to do some work around the office and he and I didn't have time to make our desk look as pretty and clean as hers as we work for a living." She got mad and complained to my supervisor who blew her off. I was extremely pissed at her and had to get out of the office for a while. By now it was lunch time and I headed to the happiest place on Earth, McDonald's. It was my intention to just go thought the drive thru and be done with it. When I got to the ordering stage of the process, I ordered a large Chocolate Milkshake and fries. The woman on the other end said that the large shake machine was out of order. Okay great, I was really pissed off and it was not her fault that I was in such a rotten mood, but I shouted back, "Well is your small shake machine working? Give me two small shakes." Her response was not what I would call too customer friendly.

My final tale for this time comes from my time at a pizza store. I had ordered a large pizza and a drink and went down to the store to pick it up. I am a cheap bastard and did not want to pay the $2.00 delivery charge. I had my daughter with me and when we got to the restaurant, the guy behind the counter said they had been having computer problems and that my order would be ready in a few minutes. It turns out that a "few minutes" was more like 45 minutes. This entire time, I had a 3 year old who was getting cranky and hungry. I was trying to keep her happy when another customer walked in the door. I heard her say, "I'm sorry, but I am really running late. I ordered a pizza a while ago and I hope you didn't throw it out." She gave her name and the guy behind the counter gave her the same spill, but he said her order was in the oven and that it would be out in a couple of minutes. She took her seat and waited. We continued to play for a little bit and then I heard the guy tell her that her order was ready. She stood up and went over to the cash register and said, "Since you made me wait, I feel that you should take off some of the price of the pizza." I was floored. The guy behind the counter felt like it was a little bit of an awkward situation. Never one to pass up a change at a little poetic justice, I stood up and said, "Wait a second, you were late and just by happenstance, your pizza wasn't ready. If your pizza had been done on time, and you were late, by your own logic, they should charge you double for having to wait on you." She got pissed at me and started to cuss at me. She was extremely mad and continued to rant and rave at me for being an asshole and some other much more colorful terms. I did not get into it with her, but instead knelt down next to my daughter and said, "Honey, you see how that woman is acting and hear how she is talking, I never want to hear you act that way in public, that's not how big girls behave." I really thought that she was going to come over to where I was at and hit me. I would never have fought back and would have taken every blow that she could have dished out. I will never hit a woman, but I would have followed her out of the restaurant got her licence number and called the cops on her. Public humiliation is always the best.